I love my van. Let me say it again, I love my van : ) Ya'll are thinking, "That must be some van! Probably has DVD players and tinted windows and hops up and down on it's back wheels." Nope, I drive a 1993 Dodge Ram 15 passenger van with a completely rusted hood and a rear door full of "My kid is an honor student" stickers. The windows aren't tinted, the AC doesn't always work, and the kids are totally embarassed of it. I love it. We bought it when I got pregnant with our 6th and we needed something reliable that would fit a ton of carseats. We have driven all over the place in it and carted around youth groups, Brownie troops, homeschool field trips, and more. My best friend and I have had all kinds of fun in it. One time we drove our combined 9 kids to the city to the annual Chocolate Festival. I parallel parked that sucker perfectly and we walked our kids around and sampled all the free chocolate.
After my BFF and I each had our 6th babies, we decided to take a road trip to MI to visit family and friends. We packed our combined 12 kids, including 2 nursing babies, and our husbands and took off. We had packed food for the trip there and the trip back. We were delayed leaving because of my husband's work schedule so instead of getting there around dinner time, we got there at 3 in the morning. My dear Granny took all 16 of us in at 3 in the morning and found sleeping arrangements for everybody. The baby at 3 months old slept on a couch turned so that it was up against the wall. I remember getting out at a rest stop to use the bathroom and all 12 kids piling out. It was hysterical, we just stood there and laughed.
I drove my entire girl scout troop to camp one year and they screamed out stupid songs and laughed the trip there and back. What a trip!
Last year my van broke. I was so sad! It sat at the mechanics for a year while we swayed between junking it or fixing it. I just never had the heart to drive it to the junkyard. We just got it back on the road and I am ecstatic!! I wanted to make a video of me driving it around to the song, "You see me rolling, ya hatin, patrollin trying to catch me ridin dirty" and putting it on facebook. Half the kids were crying with joy at getting it back and some were crying with shame. I keep telling my 15 year old that she can take her driving test in it but for some reason, she doesn't want to.
Today I rolled up to the middle school to pick up kid #3 and 2 people who work at the school were standing out front (ya'll know who you are). The lady starts talking about how great my van is and how she has always wanted to have one to drive around. I couldn't believe my ears! Someone else who loves big vans almost as much as I do! And she only has 1 kid!! I offered to let her drive it around the parking lot a few times but she declined. The man says that half my blogs are about my van so I decided to dedicate this day's blog to My Van.
So, tell me about the car that you can never forget. The one you named (ours is Big Blue) and tell your kids about. Maybe it's your current vehicle or your first, I want to hear your stories!
Monday, January 31, 2011
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Questions that are the bane of every big family's existence...
What you consider to be a big family may not be the same as everybody else. You may think 3 kids is topping out a family while your neighbor may think 8 kids is too many. In America, the average family is around 2 kids. Not 2 kids but around 2 kids. I don't know how you average out 1.8 kids per family but the government knows and they're not telling. Anyway, I'm off topic. I would like to address several questions posed to mothers and fathers of big families when we have to venture out in public. Personally, I don't mind answering people's questions because most people are not being cynical or nasty, they just want to know. Some of you may have already asked some of these questions, it's ok, we forgive you. If you haven't yet asked these, dont.
Are they all yours?
Why would you ask that? Are you going to offer to put one through college or buy us dinner? If you see a person walking through the mall with 6 kids who all look similiar, you can draw your own conclusions. Or you can get creative and ask something new and different like, "These must be your children, they all have your beautiful smile". You know, something like that : )
This question usually leads to...
Wow, your hands are full!
I know this isn't a question but I hear it so often I figured I would add it. I know that our family is large and people are sometimes a little shocked to see us but this does get a little old. How do you respond to that statement? Suggestions are welcome...
Do they all have the same father?
The first time I was confronted with this question I only had 3 kids and I was so shocked that I couldn't answer her properly. Really? You just asked that? Does it make a difference? Please people, do NOT ask that question, it is none of your business.
Don't you know what causes that?
Obviously we know what causes "that", that's why we have 6 kids : )
How do you afford all those kids?
Now, this is a genuine question and my response usually throws people off. Kids themselves are not actually expensive, it is how a parent chooses to parent said kid that is expensive. Unless your husband has a big money making job then here is how you afford a big family.
1. Hand me down clothes
2. Older cheaper vehicle that is paid off
3. Shop at Aldis or similiar cheaper grocery store
4. Live in a cheaper neighborhood
5. Stay at home so you don't have to pay for daycare
I can keep going but those are some of the big ones. I'm sure each of you has a money saving tip, please add it in to the comments.
I know there are more questions and I would love for you to comment and add some in. I think families are beautiful whether you have 1 child or 20.
I know I added a statement up there but I would like to add a couple more just for kicks and giggles. Not all of them are bad, some make me feel so special and loved.
They look nothing like you!
Your house must be so busy.
I bet you can't wait til they're all off to school.
You look great for having 6 kids! (that's my favorite)
You will never have to live in a nursing home!
Think of all the grandkids!
Are they all yours?
Why would you ask that? Are you going to offer to put one through college or buy us dinner? If you see a person walking through the mall with 6 kids who all look similiar, you can draw your own conclusions. Or you can get creative and ask something new and different like, "These must be your children, they all have your beautiful smile". You know, something like that : )
This question usually leads to...
Wow, your hands are full!
I know this isn't a question but I hear it so often I figured I would add it. I know that our family is large and people are sometimes a little shocked to see us but this does get a little old. How do you respond to that statement? Suggestions are welcome...
Do they all have the same father?
The first time I was confronted with this question I only had 3 kids and I was so shocked that I couldn't answer her properly. Really? You just asked that? Does it make a difference? Please people, do NOT ask that question, it is none of your business.
Don't you know what causes that?
Obviously we know what causes "that", that's why we have 6 kids : )
How do you afford all those kids?
Now, this is a genuine question and my response usually throws people off. Kids themselves are not actually expensive, it is how a parent chooses to parent said kid that is expensive. Unless your husband has a big money making job then here is how you afford a big family.
1. Hand me down clothes
2. Older cheaper vehicle that is paid off
3. Shop at Aldis or similiar cheaper grocery store
4. Live in a cheaper neighborhood
5. Stay at home so you don't have to pay for daycare
I can keep going but those are some of the big ones. I'm sure each of you has a money saving tip, please add it in to the comments.
I know there are more questions and I would love for you to comment and add some in. I think families are beautiful whether you have 1 child or 20.
I know I added a statement up there but I would like to add a couple more just for kicks and giggles. Not all of them are bad, some make me feel so special and loved.
They look nothing like you!
Your house must be so busy.
I bet you can't wait til they're all off to school.
You look great for having 6 kids! (that's my favorite)
You will never have to live in a nursing home!
Think of all the grandkids!
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Boxers and Bra straps
How many of ya'll have been minding your own business, walking through the grocery store and all of a sudden, there is some guy's undies screaming at you? "Hey! Look at my underwear!" Ugh! I don't need to see that! Plaid seems to be the boxer of choice, but occasionally you get the idiot who decides to wear white ones. In case they didn't know, white underwear are in fact see through and show stains more clearly. I had a guy in front of me in Food Lion one day, bent over his cart, flashing his dirty white shorts. His dirty jeans were pulled down past his butt cheeks and his dirty white shorts were flashing me. Really? Did it cross his mind that I wouldn't want to see that? That belts are sold for a reason? I recently went to a party where a bunch of teens were in attendance. A young man came in wearing white skinny jeans and blue plaid boxers. His pants were belted BELOW his butt cheeks. It was almost as if the boxers were a part of his ensemble. This fashion craze is one of the more ridiculous I have seen. Underwear should not be part of your outfit.
With that being said, bra straps are apparently making their debut in today's fashions. Girls are wearing camis (meant to be undershirts) as their shirts and then wearing their bra straps showing. Now, although I am glad that young people are in fact wearing under clothes, I don't need to see it. I have a real passion for this. I find it very unpolite that young people can't take a moment to get dressed properly. It takes just as long to put on a whole shirt or a pair of jeans that fit. When did boob and butt cleavage become a fashion trend? Forgive my language, we speak plainly at my house.
And while we're on the topic, do not wear your pajamas out in public. That is just distasteful. I don't need to see your Mickey Mouse, Betty Boob, Superman, Pacman, whatever pajamas you decided to wear to bed last night. Eww. If I took the 2 seconds to switch out my pj's for jeans to run to the store to buy milk, then you can too.
We who care should set a good example to those who don't. By the time our children grow up, clothes will be unnecessary and people will be walking around nude. You can be comfortable and fashionable in clothes that cover all your goods. I do not allow my children out in public unless they are fully dressed. No pajamas or underwear hanging out. Bra straps are covered. This is a given. They're not always happy about that but it is a manner of etiquette. I think etiquette has been thrown out the window these days but it needs to make a comeback. Did you know that cities are being rated on a rudeness level now? Baltimore, I think, was 7th on the list of major cities. Little things make a big difference people. Hold the door for someone, help someone with their groceries, say please and thank you, and pull your pants up!
What loss of etiquette bothers you the most?
With that being said, bra straps are apparently making their debut in today's fashions. Girls are wearing camis (meant to be undershirts) as their shirts and then wearing their bra straps showing. Now, although I am glad that young people are in fact wearing under clothes, I don't need to see it. I have a real passion for this. I find it very unpolite that young people can't take a moment to get dressed properly. It takes just as long to put on a whole shirt or a pair of jeans that fit. When did boob and butt cleavage become a fashion trend? Forgive my language, we speak plainly at my house.
And while we're on the topic, do not wear your pajamas out in public. That is just distasteful. I don't need to see your Mickey Mouse, Betty Boob, Superman, Pacman, whatever pajamas you decided to wear to bed last night. Eww. If I took the 2 seconds to switch out my pj's for jeans to run to the store to buy milk, then you can too.
We who care should set a good example to those who don't. By the time our children grow up, clothes will be unnecessary and people will be walking around nude. You can be comfortable and fashionable in clothes that cover all your goods. I do not allow my children out in public unless they are fully dressed. No pajamas or underwear hanging out. Bra straps are covered. This is a given. They're not always happy about that but it is a manner of etiquette. I think etiquette has been thrown out the window these days but it needs to make a comeback. Did you know that cities are being rated on a rudeness level now? Baltimore, I think, was 7th on the list of major cities. Little things make a big difference people. Hold the door for someone, help someone with their groceries, say please and thank you, and pull your pants up!
What loss of etiquette bothers you the most?
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Anti-Social Husbands
My husband is loving and kind and he treats me with respect and care. He loves our kids and is quick to come home from work to spend time with his family. He gives up alot so that our kids can have the things they need and works two jobs to support us. My husband is also Anti-Social. He doesn't accept invitations for football parties or birthday parties. He doesn't come to church functions or Bible studies (usually). He doesn't like leaving the house unless he has to. This drives me bananas. I am a social butterfly and a people person. I treasure my alone time but I love to be with people. Recently, I have had an urge to start having people over for dinner. Now, if you have been keeping up with my blog, you know that my house is a wreck. This was a hurdle for me, you don't have people over to a messy house. So, I worked on it and I cleaned my house and I got ready to invite a family over. Then, I remembered my Anti-Social husband. He doesn't really like socializing or talking so what was I going to do? I confronted him about his Anti-Social behavior and told him that I wanted to have people over but he was an obstacle in my path to being the "hostess queen". He said, "I don't care if you have people over here, I just don't want to go anywhere." HA! Was he going to regret he said that! I invited a family over here, a nice family from church with kids our kids ages. I had met them a few times and they were super nice. Well, the husband didn't talk much but the wife and I got along great. We are eating and watching the football game. We are having nice easy conversation and Anti-Social husbands come up. The woman says her husband doesn't really like going out. The man pipes up and says, "I don't mind people coming over to my house but I am just not comfortable going out much". Hmmmm, sound familiar people?? Then the woman says that she has met several men like that and I start thinking of the men that I know and they are usually like that too. So people, is it true? Are all men Anti-Social? Do your husbands like socializing? Do they like to go to people's houses for dinner or church functions? Have they made any new "best" friends since you've known them?
Saturday, January 22, 2011
The Worst Winter Ever
I only have a few minutes today as I am getting ready to go out with my Ladies (read previous post) but I just wanted to discuss all the sickness in The Worst Winter Ever. How many of you have been affected by all the colds, flus, and coughs going around? I know we have been hit here, everyone but me *said with fingers crossed*. My youngest was on an inhaler, 2 nasal sprays and an OTC allergy med, my 5th just finished her anitbiotic for an ear infection, my son had to take a 3 week break from wrestling due to the awful Cough that just wouldn't go away. The rest, including my hubby, have just been sick and lethargic. I have never seen anything like it in my life. Every single person I know has either been sick, their kid has been sick, or their spouse.
Soooo, let's just take a moment to discuss possible reasons for the rampant illness. I'm thinking subtle terrorist attack but I may be having a paranoid moment. Overuse of antibiotics? Overuse of Lysol wipies? Underuse of Lysol wipies? Too much antibacterial gel going around? Not enough antibacterial gel? Maybe it's just that Americans are really unhealthy and it is only showing now with all this "common" illness. I just can't get around that so many people are sick, it seems that something has to be behind it. I would LOVE to hear your thoughts on the matter in the comments below.
Soooo, let's just take a moment to discuss possible reasons for the rampant illness. I'm thinking subtle terrorist attack but I may be having a paranoid moment. Overuse of antibiotics? Overuse of Lysol wipies? Underuse of Lysol wipies? Too much antibacterial gel going around? Not enough antibacterial gel? Maybe it's just that Americans are really unhealthy and it is only showing now with all this "common" illness. I just can't get around that so many people are sick, it seems that something has to be behind it. I would LOVE to hear your thoughts on the matter in the comments below.
Friday, January 21, 2011
The Supermom Complex
My friend and I were talking yesterday about how hectic our lives have become. She was telling me that she just up and left and took some time for herself one day and it made her feel so much better. I think she almost felt guilty that she left her kids to be by herself. Why do we moms feel guilty about taking a moment for ourselves? Why do we feel we have to be beaten down and trodden to be the supermom everyone expects us to be?
Let's take a moment and talk about "time for ourselves" and I don't mean a bathroom break where little fingers are trying to wave under the door. I also don't mean the Bible study we joined or date night with our spouses or the moment we get to read during our kids sports practices. I'm talking about taking a time, a specific time, to just do what we want to do. Is it wrong to take "adult mom time" or should we always be with our families? Back when I just had 2 little kids, I used to take a book and go to the mall food court and buy myself a piece of spinach pizza (yummy) and read. I didn't have any friends at the time to call and hang out with, but I needed that time to refresh myself. I had no car, no friends, no family nearby, and 2 small children to care for all day. I needed time to just be me for a few minutes. Now I have 6 kids and a much busier life (and a car) (and friends) but I still take time to just be me. I might go out to lunch with a friend or take a book to the food court, but it is my time to be "unreachable" by my kids. It refreshes me and I come home happy and ready to be mom again. It also makes me a better wife to my husband. It is not wrong to take a break from your family and be the "you" before you had kids. As long as you aren't doing it more than you are being a mom : ) Some examples of "you" time might be: horseback riding lessons, sewing classes, join a choir, teach a class at a community college, take an exercise class, or read and eat pizza at the mall food court : )
Now let's tackle the supermom complex that we moms sometimes get. We feel that we must get every chore done, every child's hair brushed, all the laundry folded and put away, a beautiful dinner on the table, and be smiling when our spouses get home. Sometimes we compare ourselves to the woman who has more kids, more money, a more nurturing spouse, a cleaner home, or fill in your own blank. That is baloney (deliberately spelled wrong). I KNOW I KNOW about the Proverbs 31 woman, so hear me out for just a sec! I used to compare myself with a woman from church whose life appeared perfect to me. Her husband did Bible study with the kids and she was always happy. I always felt that I could never live up to that woman; I put her on a pedestal. Then I found out more about that woman. Don't get me wrong, she is a fabulous example of a woman of God, but her life isn't perfect, her kids aren't perfect and neither is her husband. I realized that my husband liked me for me, he liked our messy house, and our non-perfect kids. He liked my boxed dinners and my half folded baskets of laundry. He liked them because I am there. I am his wife and the mother of his kids, not the lady from church. Just as I wouldn't want any other man to be my husband, he didn't want another woman to be his wife. Find out what makes your husband happy and do it, then you will be supermom of your husband's dreams.
What things do you like to do in your free woman time?
Let's take a moment and talk about "time for ourselves" and I don't mean a bathroom break where little fingers are trying to wave under the door. I also don't mean the Bible study we joined or date night with our spouses or the moment we get to read during our kids sports practices. I'm talking about taking a time, a specific time, to just do what we want to do. Is it wrong to take "adult mom time" or should we always be with our families? Back when I just had 2 little kids, I used to take a book and go to the mall food court and buy myself a piece of spinach pizza (yummy) and read. I didn't have any friends at the time to call and hang out with, but I needed that time to refresh myself. I had no car, no friends, no family nearby, and 2 small children to care for all day. I needed time to just be me for a few minutes. Now I have 6 kids and a much busier life (and a car) (and friends) but I still take time to just be me. I might go out to lunch with a friend or take a book to the food court, but it is my time to be "unreachable" by my kids. It refreshes me and I come home happy and ready to be mom again. It also makes me a better wife to my husband. It is not wrong to take a break from your family and be the "you" before you had kids. As long as you aren't doing it more than you are being a mom : ) Some examples of "you" time might be: horseback riding lessons, sewing classes, join a choir, teach a class at a community college, take an exercise class, or read and eat pizza at the mall food court : )
Now let's tackle the supermom complex that we moms sometimes get. We feel that we must get every chore done, every child's hair brushed, all the laundry folded and put away, a beautiful dinner on the table, and be smiling when our spouses get home. Sometimes we compare ourselves to the woman who has more kids, more money, a more nurturing spouse, a cleaner home, or fill in your own blank. That is baloney (deliberately spelled wrong). I KNOW I KNOW about the Proverbs 31 woman, so hear me out for just a sec! I used to compare myself with a woman from church whose life appeared perfect to me. Her husband did Bible study with the kids and she was always happy. I always felt that I could never live up to that woman; I put her on a pedestal. Then I found out more about that woman. Don't get me wrong, she is a fabulous example of a woman of God, but her life isn't perfect, her kids aren't perfect and neither is her husband. I realized that my husband liked me for me, he liked our messy house, and our non-perfect kids. He liked my boxed dinners and my half folded baskets of laundry. He liked them because I am there. I am his wife and the mother of his kids, not the lady from church. Just as I wouldn't want any other man to be my husband, he didn't want another woman to be his wife. Find out what makes your husband happy and do it, then you will be supermom of your husband's dreams.
What things do you like to do in your free woman time?
Thursday, January 20, 2011
What's for Dinner?
How many times as moms are we asked this question? About 10 billion, especially if you have more than one kid because the first kid who asks NEVER tells anyone else. Kid #1, "What's for dinner mom?". You answer sweetly, "Chicken with rice and corn". 5 minutes later kid #2 comes strolling in, "What's for dinner, I'm starving!" You answer not so sweetly, "Chicken with rice and corn". Kid #3 comes in about 2 seconds later and you KNOW she heard you answer kid #2 but she asks anyway, "Hey mom! I'm sooooooo hungry, wha'ts for dinner?" You respond tersely, "Chicken". Kid #4 comes in, "Hey! What's for dinner?" You scream, "I don't know, what's it look like I'm cooking?? Huh?? And if you are so hungry, why don't you ask if you can help?" Now, that poor kid didn't know that 3 other kids had come in and asked the same question but she gets the brunt of all your frustration. Of course it's funny in hindsight but really, that is just a sinful response to a simple question. My husband cannot understand why I get so upset when asked the same question over and over. I don't understand it either, but it certainly gets my blood boiling to be asked the same thing repeatedly. Maybe because it happens so often during the day and I think the kids should be passing out information. If I tell one kid what dinner is, I automatically assume the other kids heard and know, kind of like telepathy. I should know better after 15 years of parenting but I don't.
There is a verse, 1 Tim. 2:15, that says a woman is saved through childbearing. Now, that verse stumped me for years and years and I actually took offence as a teen from it. I took it to mean that a woman couldn't be a Christian unless she had given birth. Now, I don't take to be a scholar or a theologian or anything like that and I am going out on my own little limb here by giving my own interpretation of that verse. I recently read that verse again and took it very differently. I have 6 kids birthed within 10 years. I have 2 teenage girls and at least 1 kid in each school in our area, including one still homeschooled. I have seen alot and experienced alot. Not as much as some and not as much as I will, but still, a substantial amount. I read that verse again during my devotion time and it had a totally different meaning to me. A woman is not physically saved through childbearing but a huge amount of my sanctification has come through being a mom. I have had to learn to be patient while listening to my daughter's long and annoying dreams, loving when I didn't want to, unselfish when I wanted to be selfish with my dessert, giving up my dreams of going to college, obeying the Lord when I thought He was being unfair, and many many more things. I am saved by God's wonderful grace and sacrifice, but my character is being shaped by my parenting and how my husband has treated and loved me.
I was out shopping recently and saw a woman being impatient with her 2 year old. The little girl was trying to help her mommy take their things out of the buggy and put them on the register belt. The mom was getting frustrated and finally snapped and told the little girl to stop. I have been in those shoes and may be again one day (I don't claim to be perfect, just ask my kids) but that day, I felt sad. The woman felt that she had to be in a hurry because there was a line and she took her anxiousness out on her daughter, who was just trying to be mommy's helper. How many of us have been there? I have since learned to speak clearly to my children and who cares if we take a little more time? Most people understand because they think kids are cute or they have been there done that. That woman is still being saved through childbearing, just as I am as I experience some new situation or even an old one that I just haven't learned from. Like the question, "What's for dinner?"
What parenting experience has shaped you?
There is a verse, 1 Tim. 2:15, that says a woman is saved through childbearing. Now, that verse stumped me for years and years and I actually took offence as a teen from it. I took it to mean that a woman couldn't be a Christian unless she had given birth. Now, I don't take to be a scholar or a theologian or anything like that and I am going out on my own little limb here by giving my own interpretation of that verse. I recently read that verse again and took it very differently. I have 6 kids birthed within 10 years. I have 2 teenage girls and at least 1 kid in each school in our area, including one still homeschooled. I have seen alot and experienced alot. Not as much as some and not as much as I will, but still, a substantial amount. I read that verse again during my devotion time and it had a totally different meaning to me. A woman is not physically saved through childbearing but a huge amount of my sanctification has come through being a mom. I have had to learn to be patient while listening to my daughter's long and annoying dreams, loving when I didn't want to, unselfish when I wanted to be selfish with my dessert, giving up my dreams of going to college, obeying the Lord when I thought He was being unfair, and many many more things. I am saved by God's wonderful grace and sacrifice, but my character is being shaped by my parenting and how my husband has treated and loved me.
I was out shopping recently and saw a woman being impatient with her 2 year old. The little girl was trying to help her mommy take their things out of the buggy and put them on the register belt. The mom was getting frustrated and finally snapped and told the little girl to stop. I have been in those shoes and may be again one day (I don't claim to be perfect, just ask my kids) but that day, I felt sad. The woman felt that she had to be in a hurry because there was a line and she took her anxiousness out on her daughter, who was just trying to be mommy's helper. How many of us have been there? I have since learned to speak clearly to my children and who cares if we take a little more time? Most people understand because they think kids are cute or they have been there done that. That woman is still being saved through childbearing, just as I am as I experience some new situation or even an old one that I just haven't learned from. Like the question, "What's for dinner?"
What parenting experience has shaped you?
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Homeschooling: myths vs facts
Homeschooling is quickly becoming more popular here in the US and is not always viewed in a positive light. Crime shows like to show homeschoolers as loners who abuse their kids and lock them away from society. In a church, you are viewed as the most patient, wonderful mom in the world who loves Jesus more than others and wears long dresses and bakes your own bread. You have slews of calm, loving children who love to sit and learn and help knead your bread. Your babies happily sit on your lap and watch with wondrous rapture as you teach your children lessons about science and history. The reality is usually the opposite.
Myth 1: Homeschooling moms are patient
Fact: "You must be so patient." I got that comment so often, even my kids got frustrated with it. I am the least patient person in the world and my kids are the first ones to tell people. I don't like waiting for anything and I am not always nice about it. You don't have to be patient to homeschool, you just have to have dedication and drive. The Lord was pretty clear about my time to homeschool and He gave me the drive. I loved teaching my kids, but it was not patience that got me through each day, it was His grace.
Myth 2: Homeschooling moms wear long dresses and bake their own bread.
Fact: I don't think so, not even close. I mean, there might be some women out there who wear long dresses and bake their own bread, but it is not because they homeschool. I wear jeans that are too long and Converse tennis shoes. I figure I'm on the average coolness factor when it comes to appearance. I'm not out to be a teen again, but I am not in the "wiser, older woman" group either. My bread comes from the grocery story unless it is a poor week, then I may make bread, but it is never nearly as good as the store bought fluffy yumminess. In fact, I don't know any homeschooling moms who fit that appearance, most are like me, comfy clothes, normal hair, store bought bread...
Myth 3: Homeschool kids are always nicely dressed and calm
Fact: I know about 50 families who homeschool, maybe more. That's about 200-300 homeschool kids, depending on the size of the family. I have NEVER met a calm, always nicely dressed homeschool kid. Most have their pockets full of little toys that they like to take out and play with during the school day. Their hair sticks up, they ask annoying questions, they need constant bathroom breaks, they get punished for bad behavior, I could go on. Homeschooled kids are just like every other kid, except where they learn. They wear hand me downs like everybody else and comb their hair as often as a school kid. They are about as calm as a tasmanian devil, unless you luck out with one of those nice ones : )
Myth 4: Homeschool kids are smarter than public school kids
Fact: I'll grant you that homeschool kids have the potential to get ahead because of the one-on-one attention from a parent, but that doesn't make them smarter. My 4 year old is on a first grade level in school because I have the time to sit and work with her. In all other aspects, she is just like any other 4 year old. My friend's kids are always a little behind until about second grade, then they zoom ahead of the other kids. There are some great curriculums out there that will teach your children many things, but like most public school kids, most homeschooled kids are average learners. They may get a broader education because alot of moms use a curriculum that reaches many ages at the same time. I have yet to meet a homeschooled genius.
Myth 5: Homeschooled kids are not socialized.
Fact: Oh my gosh, if I hear this one more time I am going to scream!! It is so untrue!! A child is not socialized because they go to a school. Period. I am having trouble writing this one because it is just so frustrating to a homeschool parent to hear this over and over. I had 5 children in 6 years and for years lived near my friend who had 4 children in 5 years. Our 9 children got together a couple times a week and played. My kids were in an art class at the rec center. We did dance, soccer, baseball, basketball, girl scouts, church activities, co-op, neighborhood playdates, birthday parties, I could go on and on. And there were a few years when we did nothing because I had no car, but guess what, my kids weren't anti-social. They had each other and us teaching them how to behave properly. School settings teach children how to interact with children who are near their age. Homeschooling gives children the benefit of interacting with many people of different ages. Grocery store clerks, teachers, coaches, friends' kids, etc. Having the opportunity to socialize my children in many different areas will give them an advantage later on in life.
This is only 5 of hundreds of homeschooling thoughts, what myths and facts can you add to my list?
Myth 1: Homeschooling moms are patient
Fact: "You must be so patient." I got that comment so often, even my kids got frustrated with it. I am the least patient person in the world and my kids are the first ones to tell people. I don't like waiting for anything and I am not always nice about it. You don't have to be patient to homeschool, you just have to have dedication and drive. The Lord was pretty clear about my time to homeschool and He gave me the drive. I loved teaching my kids, but it was not patience that got me through each day, it was His grace.
Myth 2: Homeschooling moms wear long dresses and bake their own bread.
Fact: I don't think so, not even close. I mean, there might be some women out there who wear long dresses and bake their own bread, but it is not because they homeschool. I wear jeans that are too long and Converse tennis shoes. I figure I'm on the average coolness factor when it comes to appearance. I'm not out to be a teen again, but I am not in the "wiser, older woman" group either. My bread comes from the grocery story unless it is a poor week, then I may make bread, but it is never nearly as good as the store bought fluffy yumminess. In fact, I don't know any homeschooling moms who fit that appearance, most are like me, comfy clothes, normal hair, store bought bread...
Myth 3: Homeschool kids are always nicely dressed and calm
Fact: I know about 50 families who homeschool, maybe more. That's about 200-300 homeschool kids, depending on the size of the family. I have NEVER met a calm, always nicely dressed homeschool kid. Most have their pockets full of little toys that they like to take out and play with during the school day. Their hair sticks up, they ask annoying questions, they need constant bathroom breaks, they get punished for bad behavior, I could go on. Homeschooled kids are just like every other kid, except where they learn. They wear hand me downs like everybody else and comb their hair as often as a school kid. They are about as calm as a tasmanian devil, unless you luck out with one of those nice ones : )
Myth 4: Homeschool kids are smarter than public school kids
Fact: I'll grant you that homeschool kids have the potential to get ahead because of the one-on-one attention from a parent, but that doesn't make them smarter. My 4 year old is on a first grade level in school because I have the time to sit and work with her. In all other aspects, she is just like any other 4 year old. My friend's kids are always a little behind until about second grade, then they zoom ahead of the other kids. There are some great curriculums out there that will teach your children many things, but like most public school kids, most homeschooled kids are average learners. They may get a broader education because alot of moms use a curriculum that reaches many ages at the same time. I have yet to meet a homeschooled genius.
Myth 5: Homeschooled kids are not socialized.
Fact: Oh my gosh, if I hear this one more time I am going to scream!! It is so untrue!! A child is not socialized because they go to a school. Period. I am having trouble writing this one because it is just so frustrating to a homeschool parent to hear this over and over. I had 5 children in 6 years and for years lived near my friend who had 4 children in 5 years. Our 9 children got together a couple times a week and played. My kids were in an art class at the rec center. We did dance, soccer, baseball, basketball, girl scouts, church activities, co-op, neighborhood playdates, birthday parties, I could go on and on. And there were a few years when we did nothing because I had no car, but guess what, my kids weren't anti-social. They had each other and us teaching them how to behave properly. School settings teach children how to interact with children who are near their age. Homeschooling gives children the benefit of interacting with many people of different ages. Grocery store clerks, teachers, coaches, friends' kids, etc. Having the opportunity to socialize my children in many different areas will give them an advantage later on in life.
This is only 5 of hundreds of homeschooling thoughts, what myths and facts can you add to my list?
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Mia's birthday
Today was Mia's 9th birthday and she lucked out! There was just enough ice on the ground to cancel school but not keep us snowed in. We went out to lunch at Chik-fil-A, shopped at Wal-Mart, went to 5 Below, stopped at the library, and then made it home exhausted and happy. It is not often that I get to spend one on one time with my 5th kid and we really enjoyed our day. She is quirky and funny and I enjoy her company. Taking the one on one time with the birthday kid is quickly becoming a tradition in our house, one I hope we keep going. I like to think that I am the kind of mom that spends enough time with her kids but I know I don't. Knowing that I get to hang out with them alone on their b-day is so special, especially when you have alot of kids.
We parents have a brain full of good intentions and great ideas but we so often don't get to see them fulfilled. Our kids don't remember the intentions and ideas unless we do them. It is not good enough to say to them, "I intended to take you to Disney World but it just never happened". That means nothing to a child. What matters is the things we do, even if it is just lunch alone with them at Chik-fil-A on their b-day. What special memory can you make with your child today?
We parents have a brain full of good intentions and great ideas but we so often don't get to see them fulfilled. Our kids don't remember the intentions and ideas unless we do them. It is not good enough to say to them, "I intended to take you to Disney World but it just never happened". That means nothing to a child. What matters is the things we do, even if it is just lunch alone with them at Chik-fil-A on their b-day. What special memory can you make with your child today?
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