I was asked to write a blog today by a faithful reader about curly hair. That was all I got, curly hair. I am going to take my own spin on that topic and we are going to discuss how we are discontent with our looks. Oooooohhhh, we're going to dig deep folks and get to the heart of a matter that has been going on for centuries and will continue to go on as long as people have bodies.
Growing up in the deep south in the 80's was a time of some pretty fabulous hairdos. "Big" was the name of the game. Also included were: ratted, fuzzy, curly, bangs, crimped, permed, and teased. Gel, hairspray, mousse, and curling irons were all a part of our daily hairdo regime. We got up hours before school to crimp, tease, spray, tease spray, curl, and spray some more. Rainy days were the end of the world. If the hair got wet, it would glue itself into a clump because of all the hair products. And worse, it would collapse and we were left with small, flat hair, God forbid! Unfortunately, I was born with thin, fine, straight hair. Even with a perm and extensive amounts of hairspray, my hair would not last more than a couple of hours. If I moved wrong, the whole thing would come crashing down. I hated my hair!! It never did what the other girls' hair seemed to do so effortlessly; defy gravity. I would cry and plead with God to miraculously change my hair overnight to curly, fuzzy hair that stood up like the other girls. Obviously, it never did (ya'll have seen my profile pic) That was a very unhappy time for me, I was extremely discontent with not just my hair, but my looks in general. My teeth were bucked and crooked, I wore glasses, and I had bad hair. I would beg God for an explanation but never received one. Or at least, I wasn't listening for the correct one which was, "I made you perfectly in my image". I only focused on the bad parts of my appearance. I am sure my parents attempted to lead me in the right direction and help me out, but nothing seemed to penetrate my hard head (with flat hair I might add).
Thankfully, the late 90's brought new exciting hairstyles which included flat, straight hair! Guess who was the first one to grow out her perm??? You got it! Me! I was loving the new look and trying out all different kinds of flat looks. I even shaved most of my head at one point and went with the "skater do". If you're not familiar, it's where you shave everything except for the top of your head. Even with the new hairdos, I still wasn't content with my looks. My legs were short, my hair had a cowlick that made it stick out funny, I had big feet. I mean, I could come up with a bunch of stuff. I completely ignored the good parts of me: no acne, my skin was flawless, nice lips, a great smile (once the braces came off), a funny personality, good grades in school, a good singing voice, etc. I knew I possessed those qualities but the bad overshadowed the good. I was extremely self conscious, that is, until I met my spouse.
Spouse (and yes, I do call him that to his face) loves me for me. He is constantly encouraging me, telling me how beautiful I am. He likes my hair, my skin, my short legs, my smile, even my jelly belly. He likes the things about me that I don't because they make me who I am. I was always so worried as a kid/teen that because I wasn't "perfect" no man would ever love me. Perfect, of course, by media's standards.
Fast forward to more recent years. I now have 5 gorgeous daughters with beautiful, thick, curly hair. Hair that I had always wanted!! I brush, braid, fluff, and love those curls. When they were babies, I would count their ringlets and wrap them around my fingers. Oh what joy! My daughters would certainly be happy with their big curly hair, right? It was the hair I saw as beautiful, not my straight stringy locks. But alas, it was not to be. "I hate my curly hair mom!! It's so hard to brush! Can't we have it straightened??" Do my ears deceive me?? Are my girls saying they are discontent with their looks? It cannot be! And yet, it was true. They want straight hair they can run their fingers through and brush. They want to easily change from one hairstyle to another with a quick hairbow. They don't want to have to keep it in braids overnight so it doesn't knot up. I tell my kids that I always wanted curly hair when I was a kid and they look at me like I'm crazy.
Why is it we humans are never content with what we have? I'm using hair as an example but you can fill in your own blank: cars, houses, weight, cell phone, boyfriend, family size, grades, clothes. We always want what the next person has and don't recognize the wonderful gift we have in what is already ours. There's a country song that talks about thanking God for unanswered prayers. He had prayed to marry this one girl and it didn't happen. He bumps into her years later and realizes what a gift he has in his current wife. Are we like that? Do we beg and plead for something that the Lord has obviously said no to? Or not right now? Are we content with His decision?
Sometimes my husband and I like to try and surprise our children with a great prize. They might ask to go to McDonalds and we say no because we know we are going to surprise them with Red Lobster. We are so happy to give our kids the prize of a wonderful dinner and then, what do we hear from the back of the van? "Awww, I really wanted to eat dinner out. I wanted to go to McDonalds. Why can't we go? Ya'll don't ever give us what we want. etc" My heart's response is to drive back home and give them pb&j and skip Red Lobster altogether. How many wonderful gifts do you think we might have missed out on because we complained of what we thought we wanted and didn't get?
Hebrews 13:5 says, "Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you". What a promise!! God will never leave us! I have read that verse over and over and I missed the promise! God will never leave me. He loves me, He made me in His image as a beautiful creation. He crafted me from the beginning and has molded and shaped me over time. He will never leave me, He will never turn His back on me. He wants to bless me with gifts and happiness. How could I not be content with that? Isn't what God wants for me going to be even better than anything I could want for myself?
What are you discontent about or have been discontent about in the past? How did God deal with your heart about it?
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